Teaching the skill of saying no for teenagers
How to teach the skill of saying no to teenagers? What is the importance of teaching the skill of saying no for teenagers? Is it better to teach teenagers the skill of saying no at school or at home?
The role of parents in teaching the skill of saying no for teenagers
Have you ever met a parent who is proud of their child’s obedience?
Look at the behavior of the children of these parents in different situations or at their current life situation; How happy are they in this situation?
Not being able to say no is one of the disabilities that is rooted in childhood. At first glance at this sentence, you will remember moments when you have encouraged your child not to say that you see yourself as innocent because of this, but turn to the situations that are mentioned below;
You asked your child to clean his room and he told you “no”
It’s around 11:00 PM and you asked your child to turn off the TV and go to bed, and he said “no” in response.
Your friend comes to your house with his child and you ask your child to play with him and give him his toys, but your child is not interested in your friend’s child, so he told you “no” in response.
You are getting ready to go to a party and you ask your child to wear the dress you chose for him and he says no.
What has been your reaction to your child’s “no” answer in situations? Did you respect and understand his opinion? Or did you force him to do something he doesn’t like? Or did you punish him for his answer?
Do you still think that you did not play a role in your child’s inability to say “no”?
Don’t get me wrong, we are not looking to blame the culprit here, but we are looking for the roots of this inability in children and teenagers so that we can properly teach the skills of saying no to teenagers. In addition to teenagers’ parents, there are many factors that can affect the inability to say no, for example, in our culture, making others happy with ourselves and giving compliments is very well-established and accepted, so sometimes this culture will be a deterrent factor in saying “no”. Was.
The importance of teaching the skills of saying no to teenagers
Teaching the skill of saying no for teenagers is important since it will be more difficult to fix this disability in adulthood and not having the skill to say no until that age will cause a lot of damage to the person. Losing many good social and professional situations and being in situations that are not desirable or suitable for them.
Not having the ability to say no does not always mean that a person can’t say no, sometimes some people say no, but it is very unprincipled with a violent, argumentative and aggressive attitude that this method will not be effective and principled. This topic will be discussed further.
Saying no to your face
In this case, you are in the agony of your parents, and despite your reluctance to say “yes” because of what the other person has already done for you or the fear of upsetting him, you cannot say no, and as a result, you accept.
Not to say unclear
Sometimes your reluctance shows itself in your words, but you are not clear and you cannot firmly say no; You start using Chinese excuses, for example: I can’t come tomorrow evening at all
The other person also says that there is no problem, we will return by evening. In this situation, you say “yes” with a little insistence from the person in front of you
Saying no is guarded or thoughtless
Sometimes saying no firmly does not mean throwing “no” in the other person’s face or saying no immediately after hearing the suggestion. Answering needs to be considered and the manner and manner of saying no is also very important. By saying no unprincipled and thoughtless, you will lose all your relationships over time, so it is necessary to learn the skill of saying no.
Teaching the skill of saying no for teenagers
There is a process for saying no. If you follow this process correctly, you will achieve the skill of saying no with repetition and practice over time. Parents can practice these steps with their teenagers and themselves in order to play an effective role in teaching their teenagers the skill of saying no.
A firm decision to say no
Teach your teenager to analyze the situation well so that he can make a decisive decision. Decisive decision is very important. Your teen needs to make sure that his answer is a firm one and that he can maintain his authority in his decision. Saying no is valuable. If you don’t have authority, your saying no will be worthless. Premarital counseling
Are you ready to accept the consequences of saying no?
It is important to be aware of the consequences of responding to your opponent’s offer. Just as saying yes will have consequences for us, saying no also has consequences, and you must be ready to accept the consequences of saying no and not give up and change your mind in the middle of the road.
Do not leave the other person alone
When we talk about the skill of saying no, it does not mean that after saying no, our work is finished, but that it has just begun. Just because you have to put aside the fear of loss in saying no and say no firmly does not mean that maintaining relationships is not important.
Despite the two points mentioned, you must have realized that there are further steps. At this stage, you must accompany the other person. In this way, thank him for his offer. With this thanks and appreciation, you will increase your authority and self-esteem and there is hope to receive further offers. related content : Depression after breaking up with a boyfriend
State the reason for saying no
In the third neighborhood, from teaching the skills of saying no to teenagers, ask them to explain the reason for saying no, for example; Unfortunately, you can’t because of lack of timeI will come to the cinema with you.
Now I need this money myself and I can’t give it to you!
You cannot always say the reason for saying no, sometimes it is personal and sometimes the capacity or position of the other party does not allow you to easily explain your reason, so you can postpone your explanation to another time and use these sentences;
I need time to think and I will answer you later
I can’t talk right now, if possible, we can talk about it later
If you have a solution, mention it
Giving a solution to the other party shows that maintaining your relationship is important to you, as well as the proposal. For example, when you are offered to go to a painting gallery, in addition to saying no and stating your reason, you can suggest him to go to the gallery with his other friends and you will accompany him next time.